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MK/BFD Tour Pix Page II!
Le entourage after a typical nine-hour caravan, this time from Albany to Cleveland, 7:40 p.m. EST Tuesday, July 28, 1998-- Standing, (l. to r.) Mike Keneally, Bryan Beller, Marc Ziegenhagen, Jason Smith. Kneeling, (l. to r.) J, Cami Slotkin, Scott Chatfield, Thomas Nordegg. The BFD Road Interviews Hey! Hey! While we were driving from Schenectady (where we stayed for the night after playing in Boston earlier in the day) to Cleveland (where we are right now in preparation for our show here tomorrow, and me, Scott, J, Thomas, Jason and Marc just saw "There's Something About Mary" after eating a bunch of Chinese food), anyway, yeah, during that drive Beller decided we should do something nice for you, the stalwart Moosenet reader, and conduct a bunch of interviews with each and every member of our crazy little travelling organism which we could then stick on the website. BB thought up the questions (except for number 6, which was my suggestion) and everybody got asked the same ones, except for the "bonus" question number 7 which was custom-designed for each questionee (Bryan thought up the bonus questions too, except for the one he had to answer, which was another contribution from yours truly). We all had fun doing the interviews over the two-way radios in our vehicles, even when an interloper logged onto our frequency and interrupted right when I made up the Jim Morrison joke. But that's what makes touring so garsh-damned fun! MK Wed. 1:05:07 AM July 29 1998 Cleveland Jason Harrison Smith (our extraordinarily cute drummer, who has forearms of doom and the deadliest faux-Yiddish accent this side of the Catskills): 1. How exactly did you wind up in this hare-brained adventure--er, uh...professional music tour with Mike Keneally and Beer For Dolphins? Mike and I were both playing with Joe Puerta [Ambrosia], and Mike kept looking at me and smiling the whole time we were playing. Finally Mike said to me, "I think I just found my new drummer," and I said, "I think I just found my new boss." After sorting through a few small details, here I am. 2. Did you have any idea what you were getting into when you signed on for this tour? No. I didn't expect that things that happened would happen, i.e., the ferocious drive out, having an instant family, etc., etc. 3. Name your favorite moment of the tour so far: When Mike stopped the band after I played a miraculously timed fill and I somehow managed to get out of it (at The Khyber Pass, Philadelphia, PA, 7/24). His quote was: "I'm going to have to watch the video to see how he did that." Your least favorite: Sitting in traffic for two and a half hours in Chicago. I mean, it was standstill, NOT moving. But had we not been sitting there, I never would have heard the wild Evangelical radio preacher on WGOD-FM screaming about the Devil's toys. 4. What's the most challenging aspect of touring as it relates to you personally? Maintaining an emotional balance without my girlfriend Michelle by my side. And professionally? Finding a balance between full concentration and energy channeling, and being able to switch back and forth between the two. 5. What is the one thing that you would like the Moosenet readership to know about you that they don't already know? I don't possess the fifty-cent verbiage that my erudite colleagues do. 6. What is the most annoying thing about Mike Keneally? That "heh-heh-heh-heh" laugh he does every once in a while when something is not necessarily funny--like a tension-breaker laugh. 7. You're the fourth BFD drummer in three years. Out of Joe, Frank, and Toss, which one do you identify with the most, and what sets you apart from all of them? I can identify with all three of them, actually: Toss's groove and a handful of his advanced concepts; Joe's rock and roll background and his application of it to this music, which keeps it from sounding like a fusion fest; Frank's cleanliness and technique in relation to chops. But compared to them, I'm Cro Magnon Man. Marc Ziegenhagen (stunning keyboardist whom you remember from the orchestra pit at Zappa's Univibe, he has picked up the hat gauntlet thrown down by our now-proudly balding lead guitarist): 1. How exactly did you wind up in this hare-brained adventure--er, uh...professional music tour with Mike Keneally and Beer For Dolphins? About eight years ago, I told Mike Keneally that if he ever needed a keyboard player to give me a call. Having been given the opportunity to prove myself worthy of the task between 10/97 and 6/98, and given Mike's desire to do something incredibly stupid--like tour with no money--it seemed that the time was right. 2. Did you have any idea what you were getting into when you signed on for this tour? I thought that I did, but then discovered that I was wrong, and later found out that I was mistaken, only to finally realize that I was right all along. 3. Name your favorite moment of the tour so far: Playing at Berklee College of Music, and seeing Boston and Cambridge again after six years of being away from these places which were so central to my spiritual and personal development as a digidudeski. Your least favorite: Arriving in Des Moines only to discover that during the next 48 hours, I would be cast as a supporting character in a real-time movie directed by David Lynch and produced by Stanley Kubrick. 4. What's the most challenging aspect of touring as it relates to you personally? Finding a way to not be constantly reminded of the fact that I'm utterly single. And professionally? Finding a way to not think about what I'm playing while I'm thinking about it. 5. What is the one thing that you would like the Moosenet readership to know about you that they don't already know? I am actually a lesbian trapped in a gay man's body. With two different colored shoes. 6. What is the most annoying thing about Mike Keneally? Sometimes the facial expressions he makes onstage make it difficult for me to discern whether I've just made his day or whether I've just pissed on his lunch. 7. You're a lifelong fan of both Frank Zappa and Mike Keneally. Can you explain how you feel about the music of each artist, in terms of similarities, differences, and how they relate to you as a keyboard player? The thing I like best about their music is that there's never a dull moment. Because there are so many different styles embedded in their music, it makes it very difficult to feel bored at any given moment. I think that the difference between FZ's and MK's music that appeals to me the most is that Mike's lyrics speak to me on a much more personal level, while still incorporating a good deal of the humor and cynicism that made Frank's lyrics so enjoyable. You can say that Mike's lyrics speak to me in the same way that Frank's music does. Bob Tedde (erstwhile vocalist and guitarist and Rockola leader who abandoned his flock just long enough to wildly jet cross-country between gigs and add his particular gloss to over half the shows on the tour.) 1. How exactly did you wind up in this hare-brained adventure--er, uh...professional music tour with Mike Keneally and Beer For Dolphins? When the expanded BFD lineup began to take shape, Mike found himself in need of a crack guitarist. He needed a player who could execute MK guitar lines whilst singing impossible vocal melodies over ever-shifting keys & time signatures. As that person wasn't available Mike decided to call me. And hey, the price was right. 2. Did you have any idea what you were getting into when you signed on for this tour? While individual events we're somewhat predictable, I had no way of knowing upon leaving my cozy little world in San Diego on July 19th how forever and profoundly changed my life would be as a result of this tour. Sometimes ignorance is bliss. 3. Name your favorite moment of the tour so far: Just one? No way! These are a few of my favourite things. The trees! Watching "The Stuff Falling Channel" with Mike in Muncie, The feel of wearing a sleek black dress.(thanks Cami!) Victory dancing my utter conquering of the wicked Killer Fish vocal line. Dancing with Dog Nuts. The sly smile Mike gives me every time we nail the "cello guitar" part in Drum Running. The Burritos as big as your head Basketball mural. Your least favorite: Having to leave just when I was getting warmed up. 4. What's the most challenging aspect of touring as it relates to you personally? Being away from my wife Julie and my daughter Celia.. Celia just turned one on July 16, and seems to change significantly on a daily basis. I hate missing any of that. And professionally? The music itself. I am the non-musician musician of the group, which is to say that I don't know what a Bb sus 9 with a raised second in the bass means. And while I love the fact that no two shows are ever the same, Mike's insistence upon making set lists at the last possible moment make every night like a final exam for me. (I can't complain too loudly. I won't even work with a set list in my own bands!) Thanks Mike for having more faith in my abilities than I did. .Now how do you count that intro to Day of the Cow again? 5. What is the one thing that you would like the Moosenet readership to know about you that they don't already know? Just that I'm a loner who really likes being around lots of other people. I hope my bandmates realize how incredibly in awe of them I am as musicians and as human beings. I love them. They rock.. 6. What is the most annoying thing about Mike Keneally? .................he's so damn cuddly and he smiles alot............ 7. What was it like to be Cami for one night? While I didn't walk a mile in her shoes, I did stand on a table in her dress. And the frightening thing was ....I liked it. Even more frightening was having to turn down the advances of a particularly happy Philadelphian who thought i had nice legs. I knew I shouldn't have shaved that day . PS. Sorry about the panties Cami. I thought those things were supposed to stretch.
Cami Slotkin (who moves the merch for us with devastating effectiveness, and whose presence helps greatly to dissuade the heterosexual males in the entourage from drowning in too much testosteronian locker-room swill): 1. How exactly did you wind up in this hare-brained adventure--er, uh...professional music tour with Mike Keneally and Beer For Dolphins? Four days before the tour started, Bryan called me to say goodbye. He was mumbling something about a merchandise manager, and then he said, "You'd do it, wouldn't you?" And like an idiot I said, "...Yeah." 2. Did you have any idea what you were getting into when you signed on for this tour? Is there any way to communicate that I'm just giving the interviewer a look? 3. Name your favorite moment of the tour so far: The private shower at the truck stop outside Des Moines. Your least favorite: Trying to find a parking spot--parallel, no less--for a 14-foot truck in Boston. 4. What's the most challenging aspect of touring as it relates to you personally? Rejecting Chris Opperman's marriage proposal. Five times. And professionally? Finding someone to babysit merch when I have to go to the bathroom. 5. What is the one thing that you would like the Moosenet readership to know about you that they don't already know? I miss my cats. :( 6. What is the most annoying thing about Mike Keneally? He won't let us flick cigarette butts out the window. 7. What's it like being the only girl on the tour? It's no big deal once you get used to the various sound effects of seven men. Especially in the morning. Thomas Nordegg (who is a saint): 1. How exactly did you wind up in this hare-brained adventure--er, uh...professional music tour with Mike Keneally and Beer For Dolphins? First off, after consulting with my lawyers, I was advised not to talk. However, I must say that without both the Beatles and, to quote Warren Cuccurullo's solo guitar album, "thanx to Frank," I wouldn't be here. Without the man himself, Frank Zappa, I wouldn't be here. 2. Did you have any idea what you were getting into when you signed on for this tour? Well, no, I did not--in fact, not at all. When I emigrated to America with a gypsy guitar player back in '72, it was a similar scenario. I did not expect to be reenacting The Shining, as it was at times during the ride over to Jersey. 3. Name your favorite moment of the tour so far: My favorite is, of course, the reward every night from the music--music equals music, no other descriptions. But when that white truck pulled up to Earthquake [Studios, in Watchung, NJ, after the RV didn't work out] to load the gear, that was the best, because we were free. Your least favorite: Right as we pulled the RV into Des Moines, I had a near-death cardiac arrest experience. I was losing my voice and it seemed that there was no way out. That was definitely the worst. Now, whenever I see an RV, I shiver. 4. What's the most challenging aspect of touring as it relates to you personally? It is, of course, survival--that is number one. Also, to find time for sleep in this neo-polymer, suburban jungle warfare survivor mode. And professionally? I would say that having been exposed to a slew of world-class guitar players (Jimmy Page, Steve Lukather, Frank Zappa, etc.) throughout my career, the challenge is to see every night where Mike is going, and thinking, "...hopefully this amp doesn't go down," so that the flow of pure magic doesn't stop. The challenge is to make sure everything works from the first to last note. I'd like to see or invent a device that could do a note-count from the beginning to the end of the show, because I'd be interested in how much Mike gets paid per note. 5. What is the one thing that you would like the Moosenet readership to know about you that they don't already know? I'm a guy who doesn't even want to cast a shadow--you know, low profile. I do think that I am the monument to global consumerism, with or without money. Always have the best in hand-held global communications available. 6. What is the most annoying thing about Mike Keneally? How I have to learn to hate him more and more and more for getting better and better and better by the day. I simply don't know how much more I can take!!! 7. What's your take on the Bill Clinton/Monica Lewinsky sex scandal? He had to stop playing his saxophone so that he had more time to play the 'hoMonica. 'J' (volunteer videographer, we think he might actually be a teenaged Hunter Thompson stepped through a time-warp to invade our transom): 1. How exactly did you wind up in this hare-brained adventure--er, uh...professional music tour with Mike Keneally and Beer For Dolphins? After loving Mike Keneally's music for three years and fantasizing about going on the road with him every step of the way, I came forth unto him and offered him my services as a roadie and a videographer, and he accepted my offer. 2. Did you have any idea what you were getting into when you signed on for this tour? In terms of what was supposed to happen, yes. In terms of what was not supposed to happen, no--I was unprepared for the crazy complications which have arisen. 3. Name your favorite moment of the tour so far: Arriving in New Jersey alive and with no significant permanent damage. Your least favorite: Having to endure intense foot pain due to faulty footwear. 4. What's the most challenging aspect of touring as it relates to you personally? Periodically finding myself lacking the composure with which to handle the grim realities of this tour, and feeling temporarily worthless and depressed for it. But that's par for the course. And professionally? Maintaining the level of stamina required to properly document the incredible shows that Mike & Co. have been performing. 5. What is the one thing that you would like the Moosenet readership to know about you that they don't already know? I have a crush on Bryan Beller's sister. [BB's note: What was that you said about no significant permanent damage?] 6. What is the most annoying thing about Mike Keneally? Whenever Mike has a few beers, he has a tendency to abuse me physically. 7. At nineteen, you're the youngest member of the touring entourage by seven years. What's the most important thing that you think you've learned so far? I'm an easy mark. Scott Chatfield (without whom you would not be reading this website, and whose presence as manager of this tour is the second most vital ingredient in the maintenance of our sanity on the road - the most vital being, of course, heroin): 1. How exactly did you wind up in this hare-brained adventure--er, uh...professional music tour with Mike Keneally and Beer For Dolphins? When I found myself between radio jobs, I thought it might be a good time to join the circus. Besides, Mike and I have been friends for over ten years and I thought he should be punished. 2. Did you have any idea what you were getting into when you signed on for this tour? Only in the vaguest sense. The challenges are coming far more rapidly than I ever expected, but, all in all, it has been a righteously splendid adventure. 3. Name your favorite moment of the tour so far: After several days of struggling to get everyone in the same room, entering the ancient rehearsal hall in New Jersey to find the band jamming on "Inca Roads". It was the first time I'd heard Marc and Jason in the band, and I knew it would all be worthwhile from that point on. Your least favorite: Each time I find out about the latest crisis that must be solved. 4. What's the most challenging aspect of touring as it relates to you personally? Not running out of laundry. And professionally? Attempting to lead a caravan of eight people across the country when a Motel 6 is an unaffordable luxury. 5. What is the one thing that you would like the Moosenet readership to know about you that they don't already know? Moosenet readers amaze me nearly every day. 6. What is the most annoying thing about Mike Keneally? He snores like a little electric choo-choo train. 7. In a perfectly happy Chatfield Universe, what would you rather be: god of a radio station, MK's manager, or CEO of a financially successful Moosenet? When Obvious Moose becomes wildly successful, I'll turn it into a charitable foundation. That way I'll be able to help all of the starving children of the world, instigate global peace, and get Keneally a prime spot on the Ed Sullivan Show. What?! He's what?!
Le entourage after atticus wolrab has had his way.
Bryan Beller (who is very good at making up questions): 1. How exactly did you wind up in this hare-brained adventure--er, uh...professional music tour with Mike Keneally and Beer For Dolphins? It is my destiny. There is simply no other way. 2. Did you have any idea what you were getting into when you signed on for this tour? Absolutely yes. The scary thing is that I did it anyway. 3. Name your favorite moment of the tour so far: Arriving in Rutland, VT, and strolling around in its charming little downtown area under perfectly blue skies and breezy sunshine. Your least favorite: Trying to find a place to park a 14-foot truck at 1:30 in the morning on a Wednesday night in New York City for less than sixty dollars. 4. What's the most challenging aspect of touring as it relates to you personally? Keeping my id in check. And professionally? Trying to adequately perform the following duties simultaneously: bassist, assistant tour manager, roadie, SWR clinician, happy boy. 5. What is the one thing that you would like the Moosenet readership to know about you that they don't already know? Such a thing does not exist. 6. What is the most annoying thing about Mike Keneally? His ego is so big we practically had to get another gear truck just to transport it from city to city. 7. When you look in the mirror, what do you see? Cracks. Mike Keneally (also a member of Beer For Dolphins): 1. How exactly did you wind up in this hare-brained adventure--er, uh...professional music tour with Mike Keneally and Beer For Dolphins? After I was hit with that seven-figure tax bill last year, my accountant advised me to make a huge cash expenditure in this fiscal quarter, or else I might have to surrender that bungalow in the Bahamas. 2. Did you have any idea what you were getting into when you signed on for this tour? I knew that the circumstances would be arduous to say the least, and that it would be a profound challenge to try and stay focused on the reason we were here in the first place, but I was more worried about what I was getting everyone else into, as opposed to what I was getting myself into. Which is why I'm so incredibly grateful to everyone on this tour, because they have to put up with a lot. 3. Name your favorite moment of the tour so far: Finally meeting Ron Spiegelhalter. Your least favorite: The overwhelming guilt I felt upon finding out that Jason became nauseated while trying to transcribe "Vent" in the back of a moving car. 4. What's the most challenging aspect of touring as it relates to you personally? Making peace with a decision that is keeping me away from my wife and daughter for seven weeks. And professionally? In keeping with my hero worship of Jim Morrison, suppressing my overwhelming urge to expose my penis onstage at the Berklee Performance Center. 5. What is the one thing that you would like the Moosenet readership to know about you that they don't already know? I'm half man, half antelope. 6. What is the most annoying thing about Mike Keneally? The fact that he has to rely on such an imperfect mechanism--his physical self--to transmit his ideas to the minds of the people coming to these shows. He wishes he could just feed the information directly into the audience's brains. 7. Do you enjoy being the center of the MK/BFD universe? If so, how so? If not, why not? Enjoy? Not the right word. It's a position I take very seriously, and the highs and lows which are attendant thereto scream far beyond the concept of "enjoyment" in both directions. At worst, the difficulties in making this enterprise successful (which entails keeping my family, my band, my crew, my following, and myself happy and healthy) can be so overwhelming that succumbing to despair seems a seductive option. But the highs--which usually seem to happen onstage--are such a boon to my spirit that I have no doubt that the path I've chosen is correct, and as I proceed, the moments of despair become much more fleeting. This may suggest the onset of insanity. I just hope I get a lot more work done (and get to hang out a bunch more with Jesse) before I go completely off the deep end.
Cami, Bryan and Marc gawk at the above interview at the Red Roof Inn, Cleveland, Ohio, noon, July 29, 1998. "Ha ha," they laughed together at all the right parts. Gotta go. Got a clinic this afternoon and some head-rippin' off to do tonight at Wilbert's.
Marc and Mikey partake in the sacred pre-show set list creation ceremony at Wilbert's. The entire band is at the mercy of Mike's musical whims each night. Note the runes at left that only he can understand. What a beast.
Videographer J's been growin' a jazz beard and practicin' his cool eyebrow moves. He'll be back in L.A. in a few weeks, you know. Chicks beware.
Mike Keneally and Beer For Dolphins hang backstage at Wilberts with esteemed Guest Host Aryck Adams (top, third from left). When merchandise queen Cami desires a break from her fame, she dons her full-face semi-realistic Jason Smith mask (top, second from left), and is able to pass freely amidst the throng. And how much would you pay not to know what Bob Tedde (bottom, right) is thinking?
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